


Body Without Soul (Hisoka x Illumi)

by Karimei



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Blackmail, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Gay, Gay Rights, Guilt, Heavy Angst, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, Manipulation, Mind Control, Mind Manipulation, Relationship(s), Sad, Sad Ending, Sadism, Self-Hatred, Victim Blaming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-17 00:20:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28840044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Karimei/pseuds/Karimei
Summary: After spending one night with Hisoka, Illumi realized it was a mistake and he should have never did it in the first place, but it was already too late.
Relationships: Hisoka/Illumi Zoldyck
Comments: 2
Kudos: 26





	Body Without Soul (Hisoka x Illumi)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Itzmystyle96000](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Itzmystyle96000/gifts).



> WARNING:  
> -Psychological Abuse  
> -Self-Blaming  
> -Angst

It has been a while since the last time Illumi was able to spend time all by himself alone, without any worries or problems that could preoccupy him and drift him away from relaxing. 

His duty of being an assassin was exhausting, it required enough time and attention, but he couldn't do anything against it regardless of how much he dislikes it.

As soon as Illumi finished his previous mission, he gained enough time to do whatever could cross in his mind. His thoughts were empty, so he didn't do anything else except sitting down on the tall grass and wait to see what life prepared for him.

He slowly closes his eyes and lays down on the grass. He tries to remember what he has accomplished in the previous days. His thoughts were foggy and hard to remember, it all felt like trying to dig into stone with a shovel.

As soon as he recollected his memories from the last night, his mind began to fall apart. He remembered clearly with no doubt that he has spent a sleepless and passionate night with Hisoka.

A few hours later, Illumi's phone suddenly started to lighten up followed by an irritating alarm that was wiping out all of the silence surrounding it. He digs his hand inside the pocket with the source of the sound and yanked his phone out. He accepts the call and places it next to his ear.

"Remember what we did last night?" It made Illumi feel an unbearable ache in the stomach as soon as he heard Hisoka's husky voice and how calm he was about the whole situation.

"Well, I recorded it all. Great, right? Here's the deal, if you won't accept to be my boyfriend, then I will send the whole video to your family." Hisoka giggled in a sadistic manner as he finished speaking. On the other hand, Illumi was completely speechless, he never thought he could be trapped in a situation like this. He realized that there was no escape from this dilemma without ending up with his parents knowing, so the other option was the only solution.

"Fine, I accept the agreement." Illumi says in a monotone tone and crushes the phone in his hand at the tormenting anger he is feeling.

He clenches his fists and punches the ground in sorrow.

Hopelessly and miserable, he returns to his house with a defeated expression on his face, avoiding every contact with anyone, including the members of his family.

He locks himself in the most hidden and abandoned place he knows and sits in the darkest corner of the room, so no one can see how pitiful he is.

Only if his family would know, he would surely be on the edge of dying at the cruel torture he would get from them.

How foolish of him to fall into such an evident trap. He has given up for pleasure and spent a night with one of the last people he'd think he would get a chance to sleep with.

Now, there's nothing else to do but only wait. Wait for time to come when Hisoka will eventually get bored of Illumi then throw him like garbage not long before showing the video to his family.

He didn't know for how long he had to be Hisoka's boyfriend, but one thing was for sure, it will be long enough to destroy him. 

As night comes, his eyes began to feel heavy as he slowly falls dull on the ground, all alone by himself surrounded only by darkness and the merciless feeling of self-blaming.

Now, the only thing that could make him escape the real-life endless nightmare was to just sleep and hope to dream of something beautiful, something that will distract his mind and cheer him up.

Unfortunately, exactly the opposite happens. The cruel nightmare follows him even in his sleep.

It went like that for days, weeks, or even months. Numerous whispers and murmurs inside his head making him blame himself even more than he did before.

Hisoka was making it even more, he would follow him everywhere and then unexpectedly surprise him just to tell him credible lies about him to make him feel nastier.

He knows it wouldn't be only the pain of the torture that would hurt him, but also the disgrace and shame if the Zoldycks find out.

Hisoka knew very well how badly Illumi suffers from the pain he caused, and he is proud of it. It was his plan at the beginning to ruin the assassin's life in the most sadistic way.

The sly jester was quite satisfied with the pleasure he got from his unhappy lover's pain, but he wanted even more.

In the end, Hisoka revealed the terrible recording to his family.

The guilt, the shame, the embarrassment, the pain. It deliberately consumed Illumi until there was nothing left of him, only a hopeless, lifeless, limp body.

**Author's Note:**

> Requested by Itzmystyle96000  
> Hope you like it! ^^


End file.
